This topic was drumming so loud in my heart that I decided that today? You and I are going to swallow the frog. (As Mark Twain would say.)
I had planned on doing all this later. Giving you the sweet and precious up front and the hard news later, but let's face it: I've never been great at sweet and precious.
So now you're in for it.
Before we can ever get a good grip on what good enough means in our life and learning to walk in it, we have to clear our heads of some junk that got up there.
(No, I'm not talking about Nelly lyrics from High School.) (But if there is a way to get rid of those will someone let me know?)
Myth #1 : I'm About to Get This Figured Out
Listen, I want you to make a list of all the places you don't feel like you are getting it quite right. Wife, Mom, Boss, Employee, Minister, Housekeeper, Bookkeeper, Budget-maker, Hairdo-er, Grocery-shopper, Friend, Excersiser, Accesorizer, Garden-keeper.
Now pick one of those and describe what that role would look like in your ideal life.
I'm betting it didn't include your kids pooping on the floor, losing invoices, or a few extra pounds after Christmas.
Repeat after me: The ideal isn't real. That's why it's called the ideal.
Lamentations tells us that eternity was placed in our hearts when we were created. The ideal was placed there to make our hearts long for Paradise, not perfection.
But our hearts are slippery little things and they so easily lose their place. We find ourselves thinking "I'm about to get there." I'm about to have a peaceful home, a rocking sex life, a full bank account, or the perfect haircut.
Here's the truth: You'll be there when you get to heaven.
Myth #2: I Have Something to Prove
I love my church people. In fact, I'm kind of a church junkie. So don't hear me wrong when I say I think as a church we sometimes get it wrong.
We have certain phrase we throw around when we want our public perception to be that we have it together. See if it sounds familiar: "I want to be a good witness."
I know! You just started arguing with me in your head. All the reasons that statement is true and all the times it applies. And you would be right. Lots of times it is true and we are called to be ambassadors of Jesus walking around this broken earth.
But we have to ask ourselves, what exactly are we witnessing?
Our own iron will? Our sweet and perfectly crafted words? Our white knuckled grip on how people perceive our faith?
Because that's not it.
Grace shines best in the gaps left by our imperfection. Light get's through in the cracked places. Humility is a better witness than perfection everyday of the week.
Here's the truth: You have nothing to prove. Jesus is your proof.
Which leads me to the truth you must know:
#1 Truth: Your Motivation Matters
If you have been in the church long you might be more familiar hearing it this way: It's about your heart.
Why do you want it to be better? Look deep. Get raw. Because more than anything else on this journey this truth matters.
What's your motivation?
Fear? Approval? Spite?
Here is a really hard truth you might find: You might be doing all the right things the right ways, but if your heart is all twisted up, it will never feel like enough.
If, and only if, we are working from a place of love will anything ever feel good enough. Love for Jesus and love for people. Love settles a heart-arresting sprint into a marathon paced by a heart beating for heaven.
So while you have an extra minute today ask yourself, what's my motivation?