Let me let you in on a little secret: When I talk about marriage, date night, or post a picture of me and Russ I get a spike in stats. Likes on Instagram, blog stats, emails, even in-real-life-questions and comments (So refreshing).
And then I immediately feel a little bit bad.
Because in my head, it's always been easy for us. In my reality in every way my marriage has been a safe haven and a place of spectacular grace. So talking about marriage feels a little bit like when twenty-somethings with flat tummies and bright eyes start talking about when they have kids. Cue the eye roll.
When I talk it out though, I realize it hasn't been all peaches and sunshine. Of course we have been through some really hard seasons, like that time we had five kids in four years. We've even had some terrifyingly bad days. Our experience is valid. Maybe we haven't had to overcome some of the really major challenges some of my friends have, but we do know the daily ins and outs of making it work.
In fact, this very morning we had a major love language miscommunication. I haven't been sleeping well and its February (anyone else get the February grumps?) so I was cranky and he was headed out the door an hour earlier than usual. Russ went into major "Acts of service" mode which means he shifted into get it done mode. Which mostly left me feeling even less capable and more frustrated than ever. At one point I almost turned around and yelled, "I JUST NEED A HUG!!!!" That was the point at which it dawned on me what was actually happening.
So I didn't yell it, I just said it. I need a hug. I need you to slow down and talk to me. I can handle this, if you can help me handle me.
There is no easy way to get there. We barely knew each other when we got married. It's taken almost all of ten years to get just enough wisdom for us to make it to 8:00AM on this morning without an argument.
So all that to say, I actually want to tell you our story. But it's going to wait. Because first I want to show you that God is working in this mystery we call marriage. He is moving and making us new in all sorts of ways. No two are completely the same, and yet...we all share this common bond of melding our lives completely to another.
This is how we are going to spend February. Celebrating and reflecting on all the ways God uses our very human love to write His redemption story.
I'd love for you to join in with your story, or cheer these friends of mine on as they share theirs!