We heard the girls stirring we went to get them up as we pulled up my email account. We all sat at the computer, the girls didn't care that much but we want this to be a together memory so we made them stay. It loaded and there it was. The referral. Two beautiful pictures of adorable little boys with sullen faces.
We were not prepared for the onslaught of emotions. Overwhelming excitement engulfed us, quickly drowned in terror at what we are facing, pushed down only by sadness for what they have been through in their poor little lives.
We spent the rest of the day Thursday and all day Friday battling our feeling on our knees. Hearts lifted up in prayer for truth in the cloud of feelings.
We found truth. We saw a light start burning. The road ahead of us is long and the rockiest most treacherous parts are ahead of us. But god let us see those faces for a reason. He knew the fiercest kind of love comes from parents when they look and know their babies. We looked and we let ourselves go there.
We will traverse court proceedings and visa appointments. We will fight to attach. We will scale the barriers of culture shock.
He gave us what we needed to proceed. And proceed we did.
We called grandparents and celebrated. We are making plans that by God's will will come to fruition.
We started thinking about bunk beds and minivans. We are thinking clothes and shoes. Packing lists and travel plans. We pulled out all our Karen Purvis videos and our adoption books. We have prayed. And prayed. And prayed.